Sunday, February 22, 2009

the change

I wrote this poem a few a years ago, but too often for my liking it fits another situation smh..



have you noticed the change
the living space
that grows b/w us


a space field with
unspoken words
a deafening silence


our mouths have been shut closed
hands to weak to pick up phones
or simply there's nothing left to say


Has things really changed
to the point were our friendship dwindles away
can it be to late
to change


back that is
to the good times


wanting to be w/one another
at times settling for the phone
conversations for hours
about nothing
but meaning
everything


Yet now there's this space
its growing
pushing and pushing
us father apart
slowly
yet gradually
separating us


words spoken
words left unsaid
and its those unsaid words
that need to break free
free from glued mouths
shedding light on this matter
this
change


For it continues
metamorphosing are friendship
into something
new
something
different


and I sit here
thinking
reflecting
missing
you

Don't give up, Don't give in

About a week ago, I heard some news that crushed me for a moment. I was having dinner with my mom, 1st time in awhile that we actually sat down together and ate, and I asked her about a business meeting that took place early that day. For those of you guys who don't know, my mother, sister, a few others and I co-own a computer software construction business company, that for yearsss we have put our blood, sweat, and tears in. 5 years ago we were offered 5mill, to sell; but naturally we turned it down. Instead of going after the quick fast money, we decided to struggle it out and make it on our own. Needless to say it has been a long hard journey. So when my mom starts explaining how the business meeting went, I hold my breath. She beams with excitement and explains how they would love to work with us, but the project won't start until another year or 2. In the next breath she explains how she has exactly 2 dollars to her name and needs me to take care of things financially for awhile. Now I'm not a stranger of struggle, forced to grow up at age 8, i turned 18. But this time around I wanted to scream out FUCK IT, GIVE IT UP, but i quietly said ok...I went my room thought hmm b/w rent, cable, food, phone, transportation how does tuition get paid? Tired of surviving, I want to just live... so yea it brought me down for a few days, but I REFUSE TO BE BROKEN...


One of my fav. artist wrote this song awhile ago, and it currently on repeat check it out...

Trying to figure it alll out

Hey Hey Hey

This is your girl Tracey( T, Trace, Tray whatevers clever), and I'm honestly not really sure how I'm going to use this space; but hey I signed up for it so might as well put it to good use. I love the arts so most likely you will get a chance to hear/read some of my thoughts or poetry, videos I love, or something interesting I read or saw. Only thing I ask from you guys, is regardless of your views/comments (whether its good or bad) that you express them. I am a tad bit shy, and its hard to put myself out on front street, so feedback would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks and enjoy...